Inner Strength can be the defining moment between you deciding greatness or giving up and settling. I have to say I have been put in positions in my life where people say you were so strong, I said where was my choice. I guess that is it, you have those moments in life where you feel you are just going to have to keep going regardless as there isn't another option. "If your walking through hell....keep walking." Winston Churchill. However, there are those moments where the couch may look more inviting than that cold pool on a late winter night. The difference it makes is your ability to have the integrity to follow through and know that each decision leads you to your goals. You need the inner strength to keep your focus.
Where does this inner strength come from, it comes from making a decision that you will live up to the definition you hold of yourself. If you expect more, you will do more to get it. If you are prepared to be status quo, you can't make a change. You will keep repeating yourself and your results won't change. You must put your goals on paper and you must live up to your goals if you are going to make a change.
Physically you can go through the motions and become fitter and that will carry you through. At some point that will plateau, unless you make a change in how you prepare there is no way for you to make that change to get better. Identify your limiter, this is hard because most people do not want to acknowledge their own weaknesses, they hate swim because they aren't any good, they aren't gifted runners as they are always injured. These are excuses. When you can identify that you are always getting injured running, stop doing the same thing over and over, look for alternative things that may cause an issue with your running, look for solutions instead of excuses.
Inner strength comes from acknowledging a weakness and putting your focus on removing it from your definition of who you are. Some people it is simply a fear of commitment, a fear of never completing anything that is written so clearly on their identity that they fail to commit to make the change. They want to settle for where they are, because to acknowledge they could improve means they would have to expect more from themselves.
We all know Inner Strength as Will Power. You need will power to make change, you need focus to make change, you need determination to make change. When you start to look at these qualities we need, we all have them. Courage to make a change and accept that you could accomplish anything you put your mind to. This is something that is life changing, we expect more from ourselves and we stand up and do more.
Where does this spark to make change come from....inspiration, motivation, these are things that may be exterior to ourselves. We may see someone we admire and want to do something they have done. We may get inspired by a group of people that we wish to be like and to fit in we begin to take on some of their qualities, even if it goes against our natural tendencies. Whatever your motivation or inspiration, look for ways to keep the inspiration and motivation feeding your will power. Keep looking for ways to stay strong in your focus to achieve that goal you have set.
For some it is enrolling in a run class because they don't like to run on our own. Others it may be the gym by work, it is easier to go there at lunch for a quick workout than to try to do something at home on our own. Take the time to evaluate what would contribute to your success and make it a priority to make those things happen.
There is no feeling better than to create a dream or goal, to put your energy and focus on that goal and to achieve that goal. That goal for some is to swim a length without stopping, for some it is a Try a Tri, because to be able to achieve that means that I have learned to swim, I have asked myself to do something outside my comfort zone, I have conquered a fear. Whatever you do to rewrite your own personal definition to make it a list of achievement instead of a list of limitations, the power of positive thinking will be contagious.
Every morning begin your day for being thankful you have goals, you have your health, you have this day, there may never be another one. If you could choose to do anything on this one day let it be a day of adverture finding out what else you can do, what other accomplishments are out there you can claim as your own. Treat every day as an opportunity, life will change, you will be eager to try new things to ask more of yourself, dare to live each day to its fullest, make your life one of adventure and achievment. Take this attitue into your job, your relationship and your sport and you will live a fuller life. Inner Strength is the foundation we build our physical strength on. With a strong foundation, we will be prepared for anything.
Now go out and conquer your day!
Racing
breaking away....
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Friday, October 14, 2011
The Ketogenic Diet cured my daughter's seizures
My first child was born healthy and very happy, we had everything we had hoped for, after her second set of immunizations Amanda developed infantile spasms, a type of seizure that is linked to West Syndrome. She was misdiagnosed with West Syndrome which is where one hemisphere of the brain develops slower than the other. Most likely her problem was a vaccine reaction. Amanda was born in 1996 and developed seizures when she was 5 months old. She would have a set of 12 to 15 every 4 hours to begin with. They looked like a full body crunch with an eye roll, brief, but the repetition made them very difficult for Amanda.
She was initially treated with massive doses of prednisone, which removed the happy go lucky girl we knew and loved. She gained a lot of weight and at first we saw a decline in seizures, then it turned around, she started having sets of 200 spasms which took over 1 hour to happen, life was becoming unbearable.
Once the prednisone failed the next drug suggested was Depekane. I was not interested. I was caught in a tough spot, her life had gotten more difficult by introducing the last drug. I looked into possible side effects and saw liver failure. Amanda was more of a Murphy's law kid, if it could go wrong it usually would go wrong. I tried one dose of the drug she threw up immediately and I threw it out.
I had been checking on-line at the time for drugs and solutions to what Amanda had and how to possibly fix it. My dad mentioned the movie "First do no Harm". Someone told him about it. I just kept searching and didn't give much weight to my Dad's suggestion. I still found my way back to that suggestions, my own way, the longer way. I found a website that discussed West Syndrome and everyone was really depressed. I found a website that discussed drug therapy and from the parent's perspective what the good, bad of each treatment was. That website was eye opening, many drugs per kid over many years and no solutions.
I then found the website on the Ketogenic Diet, people were optomistic and chatty, happy, struggling but with purpose. I found the group I wanted to belong to, the happy ones. I ordered the video and the book and did my reading. I was thinking we would have to travel to the United States to John's Hopkins to get the diet done, I was prepared to do anything. I was discussing my choice with an early intervention worker. She mentioned an upcoming Epilepsy seminar that had a local Doctor in Edmonton and a Ketogenic Diet Coaches that were local. They were going to be there and it was the upcoming weekend. I couldn't believe how luck could be so close to us. I went to the seminar and met with the Doctor and Team. I needed a referral, and it was suggested I get a referral to the Glenrose as well for her assessment.
I was happy to be leaving my other Doctor, he was prescribing Prednisone, going on holidays and doing absolutely no testing of her blood to make sure she wasn't suffering from the treatment. I met a family who had nearly lost their daughter to Prednisone at the Epilepsy Seminar. I was starting to feel like every opportunity of treatment that involved drugs had a shady side the doctor's weren't willing to discuss or acknowledge, they kept placing the blame and the focus on what they were treating instead of possible side effects of the treatment.
I made it, Amanda began the diet close to the University Hospital, it couldn't be done in the hospital as they didn't approve of the treatment, but we needed to be close in case she had issues during the fasting process. Amanda had no problems fasting, she quit eating period. I had been breast feeding and she had never wanted to take a bottle, now she wouldn't eat or drink. She was allergic to cow's milk a big portion of the diet is usually milk. I was hunting for alternatives, it was becoming difficult. Finally I found a formula just for this, it had protein and fat, it was soy based and I could order it in locally.
After dropping 10 pounds in a very short time, Amanda was put on a Nose tube. She then quit swallowing. You see the Murphy's law yes, if it could go wrong it did. After being on the nose tube and no longer swallowing she was headed for a g-tube. Once the g-tube was in I thought my problems were over, not. She now had reflux, what when in, came right back out and with a child that doesn't swallow, the other option is to choke constantly. We started her on zantac and prepulsid (this drug is no longer on the market due to heart problems it caused). Once the food stayed in, the seizures slowly went away.
We were nervous to do a count, we recorded seizures every day in a book, we were recording less and less, then it was no longer daily, then we crossed our fingers and hoped we wouldn't have to open the book again. The only time Amanda had seizures was if she got sick and threw up her meal. For the next 3 years Amanda was on the diet. I researched more and more and discovered her other issues were Autistic in nature, they could also be linked to prednisone as a possible cause. She didn't talk anymore, she had irrational fears and couldn't walk independently. She had issues with balance, she could only walk with her fisher price walker, she screamed in any other room than the room we were in for most of the day, to lay her in the bath was torture. It was all proprioceptive. We began substituting some of her oil for yeast free oil and added Nystatin to her regime. I was pregnant with my second child and Amanda still needed to be carried everywhere at 4 years old. I couldn't possibly carry two kids.
Within days Amanda let go of her fisher price walker and stood in the middle of the living room, something she had never done before. Although this is what I had researched should be the outcome, my Murphy's law little girl hid behind this glowing girl free standing in my living room. Within weeks she started taking a few steps, then walking along the wall. She lost her fear of the other rooms, the upstairs and soon I began to understand some of her fears. She would duck down when she came into my bedroom where there was a ceiling fan going. She had no idea how far away it was, it scared her. Two weeks before the birth of my son and 4 months after beginning the Nystatin, Amanda walked down the middle of the hallway without holding onto the walls. My life was starting to get some sunshine back in it, the happy girl was returning, life was something we were beginning to live again.
One of the things that prevent people from taking drastic steps towards holistic treatment is usually it is not the advice of their treating Doctor. I do not think people should just choose to do this treatment unless they have researched it and understand that your life becomes the diet, the diet is first and foremost the only thing that matters. We had a 13 hour schedule, she was on a g-tube from 8:00 a.m. to 9:00 p.m. with short breaks. I purchased a Pet pump to allow us the freedom to go into town and buy groceries or go for a meal. This was after being on the g-tube for 2 years already before hand. I was anal and had complete control of everything in her life, this is a very stressful position to be in. If there was a mistake, a seizure it was my fault, I took very few risks without researching them. Any change to her diet could bring on a seizure, so adding Nystatin was a risk that had to be worth while.
I believed in the diet and the exactness of it. I experimented with why there were problems, you couldn't put the oil into the meal or it stuck to her bag and tube leaving behind important grams of oil that would drastically change the ratio of the diet. I used a syringe for the oil, I also understood that she could throw up during a meal, which again would change the ratio, so I would divide the oil, first 1/2 before her first 1/2 of the meal the other 1/2 before the second half of her meal. I used Ross Carbohydrate formula for her main ingredient, I added baby food that had protein and veggies in it, usually a chicken and broccoli from heinz, or a carrots and beef from heinz, either way the GI index of the vegetable plays a big roll, not all carbs should be used as the higher the GI the more likely of seizure activity. I added the oil at the end to the tenth of a gram I used safflower oil once we went on Nystatin.
My daughter is 15, she hasn't had a seizure since she was 2 or 3 years old. She speaks, she walks, runs a bit. She still suffers developmental delays and although she looks normal she has typical autistic behaviours except, she is sociable, loves to be hugged, kissed, she likes eye contact, but has a very short attention span and still has a lot of sensitivities to sound. She loves music, she is a growing teenager with a sweet tooth. I let her eat whatever she wants. I control the sugar as it gives her most of her behaviours. Do I believe that keeping her on a controlled diet would help, yes, it may help her cope a lot better. Right now we are trying to live with less control and enjoy the time we have. We are living every day to its fullest and in time I may find ways to improve her situation further, but for now I am so very thankful for her health, her ability to be who she is and to always be positive and happy.
She was initially treated with massive doses of prednisone, which removed the happy go lucky girl we knew and loved. She gained a lot of weight and at first we saw a decline in seizures, then it turned around, she started having sets of 200 spasms which took over 1 hour to happen, life was becoming unbearable.
Once the prednisone failed the next drug suggested was Depekane. I was not interested. I was caught in a tough spot, her life had gotten more difficult by introducing the last drug. I looked into possible side effects and saw liver failure. Amanda was more of a Murphy's law kid, if it could go wrong it usually would go wrong. I tried one dose of the drug she threw up immediately and I threw it out.
I had been checking on-line at the time for drugs and solutions to what Amanda had and how to possibly fix it. My dad mentioned the movie "First do no Harm". Someone told him about it. I just kept searching and didn't give much weight to my Dad's suggestion. I still found my way back to that suggestions, my own way, the longer way. I found a website that discussed West Syndrome and everyone was really depressed. I found a website that discussed drug therapy and from the parent's perspective what the good, bad of each treatment was. That website was eye opening, many drugs per kid over many years and no solutions.
I then found the website on the Ketogenic Diet, people were optomistic and chatty, happy, struggling but with purpose. I found the group I wanted to belong to, the happy ones. I ordered the video and the book and did my reading. I was thinking we would have to travel to the United States to John's Hopkins to get the diet done, I was prepared to do anything. I was discussing my choice with an early intervention worker. She mentioned an upcoming Epilepsy seminar that had a local Doctor in Edmonton and a Ketogenic Diet Coaches that were local. They were going to be there and it was the upcoming weekend. I couldn't believe how luck could be so close to us. I went to the seminar and met with the Doctor and Team. I needed a referral, and it was suggested I get a referral to the Glenrose as well for her assessment.
I was happy to be leaving my other Doctor, he was prescribing Prednisone, going on holidays and doing absolutely no testing of her blood to make sure she wasn't suffering from the treatment. I met a family who had nearly lost their daughter to Prednisone at the Epilepsy Seminar. I was starting to feel like every opportunity of treatment that involved drugs had a shady side the doctor's weren't willing to discuss or acknowledge, they kept placing the blame and the focus on what they were treating instead of possible side effects of the treatment.
I made it, Amanda began the diet close to the University Hospital, it couldn't be done in the hospital as they didn't approve of the treatment, but we needed to be close in case she had issues during the fasting process. Amanda had no problems fasting, she quit eating period. I had been breast feeding and she had never wanted to take a bottle, now she wouldn't eat or drink. She was allergic to cow's milk a big portion of the diet is usually milk. I was hunting for alternatives, it was becoming difficult. Finally I found a formula just for this, it had protein and fat, it was soy based and I could order it in locally.
After dropping 10 pounds in a very short time, Amanda was put on a Nose tube. She then quit swallowing. You see the Murphy's law yes, if it could go wrong it did. After being on the nose tube and no longer swallowing she was headed for a g-tube. Once the g-tube was in I thought my problems were over, not. She now had reflux, what when in, came right back out and with a child that doesn't swallow, the other option is to choke constantly. We started her on zantac and prepulsid (this drug is no longer on the market due to heart problems it caused). Once the food stayed in, the seizures slowly went away.
We were nervous to do a count, we recorded seizures every day in a book, we were recording less and less, then it was no longer daily, then we crossed our fingers and hoped we wouldn't have to open the book again. The only time Amanda had seizures was if she got sick and threw up her meal. For the next 3 years Amanda was on the diet. I researched more and more and discovered her other issues were Autistic in nature, they could also be linked to prednisone as a possible cause. She didn't talk anymore, she had irrational fears and couldn't walk independently. She had issues with balance, she could only walk with her fisher price walker, she screamed in any other room than the room we were in for most of the day, to lay her in the bath was torture. It was all proprioceptive. We began substituting some of her oil for yeast free oil and added Nystatin to her regime. I was pregnant with my second child and Amanda still needed to be carried everywhere at 4 years old. I couldn't possibly carry two kids.
Within days Amanda let go of her fisher price walker and stood in the middle of the living room, something she had never done before. Although this is what I had researched should be the outcome, my Murphy's law little girl hid behind this glowing girl free standing in my living room. Within weeks she started taking a few steps, then walking along the wall. She lost her fear of the other rooms, the upstairs and soon I began to understand some of her fears. She would duck down when she came into my bedroom where there was a ceiling fan going. She had no idea how far away it was, it scared her. Two weeks before the birth of my son and 4 months after beginning the Nystatin, Amanda walked down the middle of the hallway without holding onto the walls. My life was starting to get some sunshine back in it, the happy girl was returning, life was something we were beginning to live again.
One of the things that prevent people from taking drastic steps towards holistic treatment is usually it is not the advice of their treating Doctor. I do not think people should just choose to do this treatment unless they have researched it and understand that your life becomes the diet, the diet is first and foremost the only thing that matters. We had a 13 hour schedule, she was on a g-tube from 8:00 a.m. to 9:00 p.m. with short breaks. I purchased a Pet pump to allow us the freedom to go into town and buy groceries or go for a meal. This was after being on the g-tube for 2 years already before hand. I was anal and had complete control of everything in her life, this is a very stressful position to be in. If there was a mistake, a seizure it was my fault, I took very few risks without researching them. Any change to her diet could bring on a seizure, so adding Nystatin was a risk that had to be worth while.
I believed in the diet and the exactness of it. I experimented with why there were problems, you couldn't put the oil into the meal or it stuck to her bag and tube leaving behind important grams of oil that would drastically change the ratio of the diet. I used a syringe for the oil, I also understood that she could throw up during a meal, which again would change the ratio, so I would divide the oil, first 1/2 before her first 1/2 of the meal the other 1/2 before the second half of her meal. I used Ross Carbohydrate formula for her main ingredient, I added baby food that had protein and veggies in it, usually a chicken and broccoli from heinz, or a carrots and beef from heinz, either way the GI index of the vegetable plays a big roll, not all carbs should be used as the higher the GI the more likely of seizure activity. I added the oil at the end to the tenth of a gram I used safflower oil once we went on Nystatin.
My daughter is 15, she hasn't had a seizure since she was 2 or 3 years old. She speaks, she walks, runs a bit. She still suffers developmental delays and although she looks normal she has typical autistic behaviours except, she is sociable, loves to be hugged, kissed, she likes eye contact, but has a very short attention span and still has a lot of sensitivities to sound. She loves music, she is a growing teenager with a sweet tooth. I let her eat whatever she wants. I control the sugar as it gives her most of her behaviours. Do I believe that keeping her on a controlled diet would help, yes, it may help her cope a lot better. Right now we are trying to live with less control and enjoy the time we have. We are living every day to its fullest and in time I may find ways to improve her situation further, but for now I am so very thankful for her health, her ability to be who she is and to always be positive and happy.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Balance in the water
Every once in a while things click, you may have worked on them for months or years and finally it is just clear. I had a moment in Minneapolis where the whole issue of head position just clicked. I have been studying posture and been focusing a lot on its impact of other things we do especially as it applies to Triathlon. During a backstroke session with Terry he kept telling me to pull my chin in. This kept my body in a straight plane and not the bent stick I was becoming on my back.
The Why's
Why on my front when I relax my head and let the water take it does it not translate into backstroke?
Why am I physically activating my neck extensors to fix my body line on my back?
If it isn't working for me in the back stroke can I assume it isn't working in Freestyle?
My posture assessment shows a forward head position, to be in a horizonal line in the water I would have to pull my head back to line it up, this is not the same as weightless head. It falls into laser lead and lengthen your vessel, neither of which give you a relaxed head position, so is relaxing the head for me a mistake as my shortened neck extensors and lengthened neck flexors leave me with a forward head position. This is something that was revealed in my physical assessment.
I took my questions to the pool and did up a workout, to my amazement, my head position is now pulled back, it allows me easy air on both sides without actually tricking myself to go for air early on the opposite side I naturally breath on. I need to engage the muscles in my neck to get my head in line.
How should it feel, if you stand against a wall and pretend you are being measured you lengthen your neck by pushing up and back through the top of your had, the back is where your chin is going, if you were to stand at attention, same thing, the chin would come in.
How it works. Get on your back in skate position with one arm at the side hugging your inner thigh and the other out in skate position in a 45 degree angle float, just off your back and allow your lead hand to reach, but fingers come to just below the surface of the water. Keep kicking on your back adjusting your chin position. Do not allow the chin to tuck so that your head tilts, you want a straight line from top of the head to your toes.
Once you establish your balance on your back, go back to skate on your front and try and get the same head position. Yes it is different, when you do an interrupted breath, you should return to balance on your back, if you are again out of balance you head has changed postion, keep practicing skate 45 degrees on your front, going to an interrupted breath at 45 degrees on your back until you feel you are holding your head in the same position for both. You should be able to roll without moving up and down in the water, make sure it comes from the hips.
Once you have your head in control go to swim. Try to keep the focus on your head position, you are now going to bilateral breath. Before each breath recheck your head position and correct if you have lost it, roll for air, it is right there, no matter which side you go to the air is always there, your head is in the position it needs to be to reach air. There is no change in the body line in the water, the rotation is around your axis with no distortions.
In summary, if you are suffering posture problems and practicing swim, you must use posture correction even in the water to avoid your posture becoming responsible for your next injury. If your posture is in balance, you are in balance in the water, any deviation of your posture will be magnified in the water. If you have kyphosis, or a large upper back curve, this is something you will have to work on all the time trying to get your head back, that large curve sets your head down at one and and your legs down at the other end, some people reach too far forward with their arms which puts a huge stress on the lower back, make sure you are reaching in front to a slightly lower target, this will allow you to get your legs up higher. It will relieve a lot of the lower back issues you may be getting from swimming.
Work on the posture and see all of your sports improve. The body is a beautiful thing, work wonders with yours and see what it can achieve.
The Why's
Why on my front when I relax my head and let the water take it does it not translate into backstroke?
Why am I physically activating my neck extensors to fix my body line on my back?
If it isn't working for me in the back stroke can I assume it isn't working in Freestyle?
My posture assessment shows a forward head position, to be in a horizonal line in the water I would have to pull my head back to line it up, this is not the same as weightless head. It falls into laser lead and lengthen your vessel, neither of which give you a relaxed head position, so is relaxing the head for me a mistake as my shortened neck extensors and lengthened neck flexors leave me with a forward head position. This is something that was revealed in my physical assessment.
I took my questions to the pool and did up a workout, to my amazement, my head position is now pulled back, it allows me easy air on both sides without actually tricking myself to go for air early on the opposite side I naturally breath on. I need to engage the muscles in my neck to get my head in line.
How should it feel, if you stand against a wall and pretend you are being measured you lengthen your neck by pushing up and back through the top of your had, the back is where your chin is going, if you were to stand at attention, same thing, the chin would come in.
How it works. Get on your back in skate position with one arm at the side hugging your inner thigh and the other out in skate position in a 45 degree angle float, just off your back and allow your lead hand to reach, but fingers come to just below the surface of the water. Keep kicking on your back adjusting your chin position. Do not allow the chin to tuck so that your head tilts, you want a straight line from top of the head to your toes.
Once you establish your balance on your back, go back to skate on your front and try and get the same head position. Yes it is different, when you do an interrupted breath, you should return to balance on your back, if you are again out of balance you head has changed postion, keep practicing skate 45 degrees on your front, going to an interrupted breath at 45 degrees on your back until you feel you are holding your head in the same position for both. You should be able to roll without moving up and down in the water, make sure it comes from the hips.
Once you have your head in control go to swim. Try to keep the focus on your head position, you are now going to bilateral breath. Before each breath recheck your head position and correct if you have lost it, roll for air, it is right there, no matter which side you go to the air is always there, your head is in the position it needs to be to reach air. There is no change in the body line in the water, the rotation is around your axis with no distortions.
In summary, if you are suffering posture problems and practicing swim, you must use posture correction even in the water to avoid your posture becoming responsible for your next injury. If your posture is in balance, you are in balance in the water, any deviation of your posture will be magnified in the water. If you have kyphosis, or a large upper back curve, this is something you will have to work on all the time trying to get your head back, that large curve sets your head down at one and and your legs down at the other end, some people reach too far forward with their arms which puts a huge stress on the lower back, make sure you are reaching in front to a slightly lower target, this will allow you to get your legs up higher. It will relieve a lot of the lower back issues you may be getting from swimming.
Work on the posture and see all of your sports improve. The body is a beautiful thing, work wonders with yours and see what it can achieve.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Total Immersion Summit Minneapolis
Day 1 - Let the learning begin, I signed up for the other stroke clinic where we cover the butterfly, the breast and the back, the three b's. I love Triathlon, so doing things in 3's is the right amount of variety to keep me moving and learning. I was very happy with the clinic, it was for the coaches only. I was able to get into the pool with 12 - 14 other coaches. The butterfly had a gentle introduction and I have to say that the ease of which we moved into it made me realize that struggling was not going to happen today. The quiet progress was as successful as I predicted. I am not a multi stroked swimmer and have only attempted butterfly during masters swims a few times usually with fins and a lot of energy. I was enjoying the relaxed feel and the ease of executing to be sure.
Breast stroke was a function of streamline and timing to get the finesse, the back stroke to be continued tomorrow of course offered the sinus full of water I was expecting and some gravity shifting I would expect for a bi-lateral stroke. Doing the butterfly and breast offered the challenge of changing the focus to something completely different, where the backstroke brought you back to the shift of weight. I enjoyed being in the pool learning again rather than just teaching.
Maria showed up and was showing me her group on the ipad doing their first open water swim after 5 lessons. She is busy as we all are, and as excited about the progress of her athletes as she was in March, very nice to see her again. I got to put some faces to some names on the ticoach list and noticed we had a number of people ranging in experience from months to years, a great mix for a summit.
When we got into the summit it was all business, a little bit of an uphill grind trying to take it all in, but thankfully Shinji is very organized and has made this something we can look up and reflect on later. I was pleased to see that my career path to master coach was laid out, I no longer had to wonder how to get there, Shinji created a map. There is an enormous amount of new information to cover regarding the business side, I hope it is spaced out over the entire weekend.
Sitting in the summit with the coaches around the table made for an interesting introduction time. It makes you curious about everyones experiences, everyones philosophies and how they integrate Total Immersion into their jobs and futures.
This is an optomistic time for Total Immersion in a year where things are so difficult for so many, where success is not guaranteed to those who are willing to work hard at their jobs, learning that going with the flow may actually be the answer to many peoples problems with swimming, one only hopes they find that easy efficient transition into employment and financial security, it begins with balancing the budget, streamlining spending and moving forward. Let's hope this is something we can all learn.
Breast stroke was a function of streamline and timing to get the finesse, the back stroke to be continued tomorrow of course offered the sinus full of water I was expecting and some gravity shifting I would expect for a bi-lateral stroke. Doing the butterfly and breast offered the challenge of changing the focus to something completely different, where the backstroke brought you back to the shift of weight. I enjoyed being in the pool learning again rather than just teaching.
Maria showed up and was showing me her group on the ipad doing their first open water swim after 5 lessons. She is busy as we all are, and as excited about the progress of her athletes as she was in March, very nice to see her again. I got to put some faces to some names on the ticoach list and noticed we had a number of people ranging in experience from months to years, a great mix for a summit.
When we got into the summit it was all business, a little bit of an uphill grind trying to take it all in, but thankfully Shinji is very organized and has made this something we can look up and reflect on later. I was pleased to see that my career path to master coach was laid out, I no longer had to wonder how to get there, Shinji created a map. There is an enormous amount of new information to cover regarding the business side, I hope it is spaced out over the entire weekend.
Sitting in the summit with the coaches around the table made for an interesting introduction time. It makes you curious about everyones experiences, everyones philosophies and how they integrate Total Immersion into their jobs and futures.
This is an optomistic time for Total Immersion in a year where things are so difficult for so many, where success is not guaranteed to those who are willing to work hard at their jobs, learning that going with the flow may actually be the answer to many peoples problems with swimming, one only hopes they find that easy efficient transition into employment and financial security, it begins with balancing the budget, streamlining spending and moving forward. Let's hope this is something we can all learn.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Postural Assessment and the Triathlete
Postural Assessment is to see how imperfections in your posture reveal muscle length imbalances. These imbalances can play a roll in injury during training. Most of these imbalances come from having bad postural habits, while sitting and standing while at work, driving and doing our every day activities. Many hours of bad posture can not be reversed by small exercises, they take a conscious effort to correct, you must focus on correct posture while sitting, driving, and doing our every day activities.
Your head should be centered over the shoulders, you have a cervical curve in your spine, a thoracic curve, and a lumbar curve. If any part of those curves is exaggerated or reduced there is a risk of injury. Sitting at our desk with shoulders rolled forward and head reaching forward is enhancing or exaggerating our thoracic (upper back) curve, it lengthens the muscles in the back, shortens the muscles in the back of the neck, lengthens the muscles in the front of the neck and shortens the chest muscles, just by having a forward reaching posture during your work day, you can create a pattern of movement which can lead to shoulder problems.
Keep your head over your shoulders, your shoulders back and down, a small lumbar curve with slight forward tilt of the pelvis and you are sitting correctly, at attention. This will take time to become less work as you have to actively pull your shoulders back if the back muscles have lengthened, now you need to strengthen them. If the pectoral muscles have shortened they need to be stretched, working the back will stretch the chest.
How does this affect the triathlete. Look at your posture during swimming. Freestyle swim is an internal rotation of the shoulder, this shortens the pecs or chest, as it is actively using those muscles. Basically swimming will accentuate bad posture by strengthening the short muscles and lengthening the long muscles. How do you correct this, add external shoulder rotation to your dryland training, add shoulder retraction, work through the middle and lower traps. If you add some back stroke to your workout you will also work at lengthening the muscles that you are shortening, it is a balancing act, it is something you need to focus on all the time, work the muscles in balance, the minute you work one and ignore the other you will see changes in joint mobility and movement patterns.
Rounded lower backs, as we slouch at our desk or hang over the steering wheel we are allowing our lumbar curve to round, constant sitting shortens our hip flexors and lengthens our glutes. The hip is the one area of the body that once it is no longer in balance can cause lower back, hip, knee and foot problems. By shortening one side of the supporting muscles of the hip socket you are creating a new movement pattern for the hip in the socket. When the hip is weak the body will compensate, it will try to use the lower back to do the work. Ever notice on a long ride that if you have one leg that feels powerless that the spinal errectors on that side are tight and get tighter as the ride gets longer. This is a sign you need to work those hips, you need them to do their job.
I have included a PDF of my abbreviated static assessment, it is just for information purposes, to help you see what some of the problems look like in a photo. It is another way to look at things and you may decide it is time to do something about it. Race Season is months away, what better time to make the change than now.
http://www.telusplanet.net/public/gflint/GailFlintStaticassessment3.pdf
Your head should be centered over the shoulders, you have a cervical curve in your spine, a thoracic curve, and a lumbar curve. If any part of those curves is exaggerated or reduced there is a risk of injury. Sitting at our desk with shoulders rolled forward and head reaching forward is enhancing or exaggerating our thoracic (upper back) curve, it lengthens the muscles in the back, shortens the muscles in the back of the neck, lengthens the muscles in the front of the neck and shortens the chest muscles, just by having a forward reaching posture during your work day, you can create a pattern of movement which can lead to shoulder problems.Keep your head over your shoulders, your shoulders back and down, a small lumbar curve with slight forward tilt of the pelvis and you are sitting correctly, at attention. This will take time to become less work as you have to actively pull your shoulders back if the back muscles have lengthened, now you need to strengthen them. If the pectoral muscles have shortened they need to be stretched, working the back will stretch the chest.
How does this affect the triathlete. Look at your posture during swimming. Freestyle swim is an internal rotation of the shoulder, this shortens the pecs or chest, as it is actively using those muscles. Basically swimming will accentuate bad posture by strengthening the short muscles and lengthening the long muscles. How do you correct this, add external shoulder rotation to your dryland training, add shoulder retraction, work through the middle and lower traps. If you add some back stroke to your workout you will also work at lengthening the muscles that you are shortening, it is a balancing act, it is something you need to focus on all the time, work the muscles in balance, the minute you work one and ignore the other you will see changes in joint mobility and movement patterns.
Rounded lower backs, as we slouch at our desk or hang over the steering wheel we are allowing our lumbar curve to round, constant sitting shortens our hip flexors and lengthens our glutes. The hip is the one area of the body that once it is no longer in balance can cause lower back, hip, knee and foot problems. By shortening one side of the supporting muscles of the hip socket you are creating a new movement pattern for the hip in the socket. When the hip is weak the body will compensate, it will try to use the lower back to do the work. Ever notice on a long ride that if you have one leg that feels powerless that the spinal errectors on that side are tight and get tighter as the ride gets longer. This is a sign you need to work those hips, you need them to do their job.
I have included a PDF of my abbreviated static assessment, it is just for information purposes, to help you see what some of the problems look like in a photo. It is another way to look at things and you may decide it is time to do something about it. Race Season is months away, what better time to make the change than now.
http://www.telusplanet.net/public/gflint/GailFlintStaticassessment3.pdf
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Day 1 Training for Ironman 2012 - Break the process into steps.
Inspiration is one thing you can say happens when you think of Ironman as an accomplishment. I had an email from a truly great mentor and the words rang so true, I have to use them a few times here. Let go of doubts, let go of perception, let go of personal definitions, just be all you can be, be an Ironman.
This Years Goals - injury proof, fastest swim, bike and run next year through focus and fine tuning. Goal on swim 1:47/100 m T1 5 min, Bike 31 km/hr av, T2 4 min, Run 4 hours 15 minutes, race weight 138, nutrition plan is to avoid sugar until end of the bike. Plan for more neutral food, rice and egg wraps, hammer bars, maybe try heed, have been using coconut milk, but finding this hasn't been easy, or cheap.
Step 1 - physical assessment, discover muscular imbalance and work the corrections into my regular workouts. Follow up every 3 months on progress.
Step 2 - Muscular Imbalance Correction - follow a more tailored approach to strength training to gain better function, and injury prevention.
Step 3- Swim/bike/run assessment - using video analysis to reveal any form problems early to have time to focus on correction.
Step 4 - Plan workouts around the corrections, be specific and test regularly to reveal if the plan is working.
Step 5 - Begin race weight plan and nutrition plan to provide the nutrition needed to train at a higher level and recover fully.
Step 6 - Implement plan - each phase of training has its own focus. These focuses are what you will be testing at the end of each phase. If you were to improve technique, has it worked. If so you are moving on to Base training focusing on maintaining your focus while building endurance. The same is true through each phase to maintain your focus under intensity in build and again during racing.
Step 7 - Test, test and test again. Re-assess your physical state, has the corrective work helped, are you moving on to more strength training or are you still working on balancing the muscles. Test your technique, have you been able to make the changes to your technique. Test your speed, are you getting the speed changes you were planning for. Test your nutrition,look over your nutritional diary and see if you are following a proper diet with appropriate recovery meals to allow adequate recovery.
Step 8 - Increase the intensity of everything as you get close to your target. Focused technique with speed sets and endurance sets, bricks of two together. Longer workouts to practice pacing and nutrition.
Step 9 - Write the race strategy you have been building, it includes your focus on technique, your nutrition plan, your pacing plan, your minute by minute focus for the entire race, so you are racing your plan every minute. Plan for adversity, put in what you will do if that happens, leave nothing to chance, if you are mentally rehearsed it will not be a mental blindside on your race, it will be a trained response to adversity. "Fail to plan, plan to fail".
Step 10 - Race your plan.
This Years Goals - injury proof, fastest swim, bike and run next year through focus and fine tuning. Goal on swim 1:47/100 m T1 5 min, Bike 31 km/hr av, T2 4 min, Run 4 hours 15 minutes, race weight 138, nutrition plan is to avoid sugar until end of the bike. Plan for more neutral food, rice and egg wraps, hammer bars, maybe try heed, have been using coconut milk, but finding this hasn't been easy, or cheap.
Step 1 - physical assessment, discover muscular imbalance and work the corrections into my regular workouts. Follow up every 3 months on progress.
Step 2 - Muscular Imbalance Correction - follow a more tailored approach to strength training to gain better function, and injury prevention.
Step 3- Swim/bike/run assessment - using video analysis to reveal any form problems early to have time to focus on correction.
Step 4 - Plan workouts around the corrections, be specific and test regularly to reveal if the plan is working.
Step 5 - Begin race weight plan and nutrition plan to provide the nutrition needed to train at a higher level and recover fully.
Step 6 - Implement plan - each phase of training has its own focus. These focuses are what you will be testing at the end of each phase. If you were to improve technique, has it worked. If so you are moving on to Base training focusing on maintaining your focus while building endurance. The same is true through each phase to maintain your focus under intensity in build and again during racing.
Step 7 - Test, test and test again. Re-assess your physical state, has the corrective work helped, are you moving on to more strength training or are you still working on balancing the muscles. Test your technique, have you been able to make the changes to your technique. Test your speed, are you getting the speed changes you were planning for. Test your nutrition,look over your nutritional diary and see if you are following a proper diet with appropriate recovery meals to allow adequate recovery.
Step 8 - Increase the intensity of everything as you get close to your target. Focused technique with speed sets and endurance sets, bricks of two together. Longer workouts to practice pacing and nutrition.
Step 9 - Write the race strategy you have been building, it includes your focus on technique, your nutrition plan, your pacing plan, your minute by minute focus for the entire race, so you are racing your plan every minute. Plan for adversity, put in what you will do if that happens, leave nothing to chance, if you are mentally rehearsed it will not be a mental blindside on your race, it will be a trained response to adversity. "Fail to plan, plan to fail".
Step 10 - Race your plan.
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Ironman in one Year
Ironman is the biggest draw, the biggest dream and the biggest undertaking in Triathlon. I am surprised how quickly people jump onto the Ironman wagon once they have a try of their first Triathlon. I get to meet them, I know people who try an Ironman without ever having done a Triathlon, I guess when you don't know what you are in for, that could be the charm.
This year I have had many athletes training for 1/2 Ironmans as their goal for their first year of Triathlon and a few who chose both the 1/2 and Ironman for their first year. How do you even begin.
First - how fit are you?
In order to do the repetitious training of swim, bike and run without getting an injury, I am usually pushing these athletes to build their core, hips and shoulders. This is essentially the off season training we begin with, getting in some bootcamp style biking with weights and core all focusing on the sports they will be training in. We spend a few months here. The aerobic is not the focus, but it is present throughout the training, you never want to lose your run fitness, so we keep the distances shorter.
For the swim, I focus on Technique. This year the focus will be more specific on technique until Base Training. If I am completely intent on getting the stroke perfected then as we move closer to race day, the stress of the swim increases and the shift of focus becomes endurance and speed. These both work against hanging onto new technique changes. Why, just because the focus on the individual is no longer on what they are doing in the water, but how far and how fast, these are never good focuses when technique is the need.
Run training, over the last year the run intensity was brought up during base, I do hills and we did a few intervals. I may put this one off a little longer to avoid the injuries that come with it, and an early peak (pre-race). Athletes are insistent on training harder all the time, as a coach you are there to keep them on track. Peaking too soon is a problem of increasing intensity too soon. This year I see hill climbing as part of the program again. Other years I have done this, it is a great learning experience for form and using gravity to your advantage, it builds strength and foot and ankle strength. This workout also keeps training interesting when we get outside, it isn't road running, it isn't treadmill running.
Bike Training, this last year the workouts were not easy, we kept to the classroom and the midweek workouts were done on trainers. It is really hard to assess a bike fit and form when you are on a spin bike. I may need to run a few individual classes where we bring in the bikes and trainers and do a workout that way. Heart rate testing on the bike sounds like the ticket, we may be able to pull this one off.
Base Training - this is where we begin to build in the volume, there is a long bike, long run and a long swim. We progress slowly, so the longer away from you event you begin your base the slower you can afford to build, this allows for the best peak on race day. You need a really great base in order to sustain the build and peak. I keep the core, shoulder stability and hip mobility involved all the way through the base phase.
The midweek training is starting to look like triathlon training with strength. We are doing longer bootcamps to try to build the endurance in and keep the intensity high. The nutrition side of training is important, so this particular long highly intense day makes people learn what will work on race day and what won't. Lately I think we need to keep this day in all the way to race day. We are losing our hardness heading into the races that happen further away from Bootcamp. I have tried to write it in, but I think the intensity of a class based training is higher than individual training. This year I will be changing this. I will keep the Friday Class running through the summer when I can.
I may need to shorten some rides to encourage higher intensity practice on the bike, but this only works for people in their second or third year of Ironman training. That first year is spent mostly in volume and endurance building so that on race day it is no question they can finish and they have a set pace they can dial into.
Swim Training becomes more about holding good technique over longer sets. We are starting to do some base line timings to see where we are at in relationship to our goals. Technique is the focus, but we are having to hold it longer each time.
Build - this is where we are starting to reach maximum volumes, we are increasing the intensity of our midweek workouts and getting our continuous open water swims in. We practice tactics in the water and nutrition strategies on the bike, to see what will work for race day. The shorter runs are becoming threshold intervals held longer and longer,the long run is reaching peak volume, 2 times before race day. Build is usually done once we are outside for our training. So their is a shift that happens here where the whole biking changes, the will to do intervals is gone as people don't like to fight headwinds and hills. It becomes less inviting to do your hard bike in the rain, I think indoor training may help this coming year, or less rain.
Peak - when we are peaking we have achieved all of our maximum distances, all of our hardest workouts and we are beginning the recovery and sharpening phase. You will reduce your volume and start to hit your race pace as everything shortens up. You are making sure any injuries are fully tended to before race day. THis is your time to gather your energy for the race. Focus, Focus, Focus, write a race strategy, do not leave the race to chance, have checklists be prepared, you trained all year for this make sure you plan the day and have ways of dealing with adversity on the fly during your race.
Race Day - Ironman is for the first timer a trial to see if you have what it takes, it is realizing your potential, you will ask yourself many times during this event, "What was I thinking?" "I can't do this". That is negative thoughts, they can rule your day, so practice the rebuttal and understand that you have what it takes, any thought in your brain should be focused on executing your race.
During the swim, your focus is on technique, pace, sighting, stay focused and you will have your best swim, do not think about what others are doing, you can only control what you are doing, it is your race.
Transition, be brief and prepared, know what you are getting, get it and go. You can easily take 3 minutes off transition by being clear about why you are there, rehearsing how you will get dressed so that you get your jersey on before your helmet.
Biking, focus on pace and nutrition. The aid stations are a set time apart, this allows you to use each aid station as a reminder to take electrolytes, drink a bottle of water in between every 2 aid stations if they are an hour apart, remember to eat so many calories every 2 aid stations. Focus on cadence and perceived effort, remember you have to do a Marathon when you get off the bike.
The Marathon, you will meet so many people who want to talk to you on the run, this makes it enjoyable, you should focus on one mile at a time and walk while you drink at the aid station. If speed is your goal and you are new to this, this strategy works, your legs get a break and a stretch and you will actually catch up to anyone who didn't take the small walk break. Your legs will last longer and prevent cramping when you take those short walk breaks, plus you get to drink your fluid without tossing it into you lungs instead.
When you get to the finish chute, it was only 1 year ago you signed up, you asked yourself all year, can I do this? If you can do the training you can do the race. Raise your arms up with whatever little energy you have left and smile as big as you can, look for the camera keep the arms up keep smiling until you see the flash, at that point you have also heard those words "You are an Ironman!" Enjoy this moment and let it all sink in, let them take off your timing chip, if you bend down now, you might black out. Take time to walk it down until you feel okay and have a bite to eat. If you aren't feeling well, haven't peed in forever, get to the medic tent let them check you out. If they do IV here it is less trouble than heading into a hospital waiting room the following day.
If you are a repeating Ironman, never take those words for granted "You are an Ironman". You earn this every year, it is something you will understand that circumstances change and one day this may not be something you can accomplish, you will look back on every one you did as a great memory. We all get focused on always getting better, but honestly that we do it, is what is important. That you can do it, is what you need to cherish. Life is about the journey, this journey to Ironman is the road less travelled for sure. What you will know when you are done, is that when you put your mind to something and follow it through with hard work and planning, you can do it. If you can do Ironman, what else can you do, it becomes an instant feeling of freedom, we have gotten rid of our limits, we can achieve anything we put our minds to.
Post Race - now is the time to finally mow the lawn, visit the friends you haven't seen in the last year, eat the food you denied yourself and look at the finishers photos. It feels like so long ago already. Time to sign up again.
This year I have had many athletes training for 1/2 Ironmans as their goal for their first year of Triathlon and a few who chose both the 1/2 and Ironman for their first year. How do you even begin.
First - how fit are you?
In order to do the repetitious training of swim, bike and run without getting an injury, I am usually pushing these athletes to build their core, hips and shoulders. This is essentially the off season training we begin with, getting in some bootcamp style biking with weights and core all focusing on the sports they will be training in. We spend a few months here. The aerobic is not the focus, but it is present throughout the training, you never want to lose your run fitness, so we keep the distances shorter.
For the swim, I focus on Technique. This year the focus will be more specific on technique until Base Training. If I am completely intent on getting the stroke perfected then as we move closer to race day, the stress of the swim increases and the shift of focus becomes endurance and speed. These both work against hanging onto new technique changes. Why, just because the focus on the individual is no longer on what they are doing in the water, but how far and how fast, these are never good focuses when technique is the need.
Run training, over the last year the run intensity was brought up during base, I do hills and we did a few intervals. I may put this one off a little longer to avoid the injuries that come with it, and an early peak (pre-race). Athletes are insistent on training harder all the time, as a coach you are there to keep them on track. Peaking too soon is a problem of increasing intensity too soon. This year I see hill climbing as part of the program again. Other years I have done this, it is a great learning experience for form and using gravity to your advantage, it builds strength and foot and ankle strength. This workout also keeps training interesting when we get outside, it isn't road running, it isn't treadmill running.
Bike Training, this last year the workouts were not easy, we kept to the classroom and the midweek workouts were done on trainers. It is really hard to assess a bike fit and form when you are on a spin bike. I may need to run a few individual classes where we bring in the bikes and trainers and do a workout that way. Heart rate testing on the bike sounds like the ticket, we may be able to pull this one off.
Base Training - this is where we begin to build in the volume, there is a long bike, long run and a long swim. We progress slowly, so the longer away from you event you begin your base the slower you can afford to build, this allows for the best peak on race day. You need a really great base in order to sustain the build and peak. I keep the core, shoulder stability and hip mobility involved all the way through the base phase.
The midweek training is starting to look like triathlon training with strength. We are doing longer bootcamps to try to build the endurance in and keep the intensity high. The nutrition side of training is important, so this particular long highly intense day makes people learn what will work on race day and what won't. Lately I think we need to keep this day in all the way to race day. We are losing our hardness heading into the races that happen further away from Bootcamp. I have tried to write it in, but I think the intensity of a class based training is higher than individual training. This year I will be changing this. I will keep the Friday Class running through the summer when I can.
I may need to shorten some rides to encourage higher intensity practice on the bike, but this only works for people in their second or third year of Ironman training. That first year is spent mostly in volume and endurance building so that on race day it is no question they can finish and they have a set pace they can dial into.
Swim Training becomes more about holding good technique over longer sets. We are starting to do some base line timings to see where we are at in relationship to our goals. Technique is the focus, but we are having to hold it longer each time.
Build - this is where we are starting to reach maximum volumes, we are increasing the intensity of our midweek workouts and getting our continuous open water swims in. We practice tactics in the water and nutrition strategies on the bike, to see what will work for race day. The shorter runs are becoming threshold intervals held longer and longer,the long run is reaching peak volume, 2 times before race day. Build is usually done once we are outside for our training. So their is a shift that happens here where the whole biking changes, the will to do intervals is gone as people don't like to fight headwinds and hills. It becomes less inviting to do your hard bike in the rain, I think indoor training may help this coming year, or less rain.
Peak - when we are peaking we have achieved all of our maximum distances, all of our hardest workouts and we are beginning the recovery and sharpening phase. You will reduce your volume and start to hit your race pace as everything shortens up. You are making sure any injuries are fully tended to before race day. THis is your time to gather your energy for the race. Focus, Focus, Focus, write a race strategy, do not leave the race to chance, have checklists be prepared, you trained all year for this make sure you plan the day and have ways of dealing with adversity on the fly during your race.
Race Day - Ironman is for the first timer a trial to see if you have what it takes, it is realizing your potential, you will ask yourself many times during this event, "What was I thinking?" "I can't do this". That is negative thoughts, they can rule your day, so practice the rebuttal and understand that you have what it takes, any thought in your brain should be focused on executing your race.
During the swim, your focus is on technique, pace, sighting, stay focused and you will have your best swim, do not think about what others are doing, you can only control what you are doing, it is your race.
Transition, be brief and prepared, know what you are getting, get it and go. You can easily take 3 minutes off transition by being clear about why you are there, rehearsing how you will get dressed so that you get your jersey on before your helmet.
Biking, focus on pace and nutrition. The aid stations are a set time apart, this allows you to use each aid station as a reminder to take electrolytes, drink a bottle of water in between every 2 aid stations if they are an hour apart, remember to eat so many calories every 2 aid stations. Focus on cadence and perceived effort, remember you have to do a Marathon when you get off the bike.
The Marathon, you will meet so many people who want to talk to you on the run, this makes it enjoyable, you should focus on one mile at a time and walk while you drink at the aid station. If speed is your goal and you are new to this, this strategy works, your legs get a break and a stretch and you will actually catch up to anyone who didn't take the small walk break. Your legs will last longer and prevent cramping when you take those short walk breaks, plus you get to drink your fluid without tossing it into you lungs instead.
When you get to the finish chute, it was only 1 year ago you signed up, you asked yourself all year, can I do this? If you can do the training you can do the race. Raise your arms up with whatever little energy you have left and smile as big as you can, look for the camera keep the arms up keep smiling until you see the flash, at that point you have also heard those words "You are an Ironman!" Enjoy this moment and let it all sink in, let them take off your timing chip, if you bend down now, you might black out. Take time to walk it down until you feel okay and have a bite to eat. If you aren't feeling well, haven't peed in forever, get to the medic tent let them check you out. If they do IV here it is less trouble than heading into a hospital waiting room the following day.
If you are a repeating Ironman, never take those words for granted "You are an Ironman". You earn this every year, it is something you will understand that circumstances change and one day this may not be something you can accomplish, you will look back on every one you did as a great memory. We all get focused on always getting better, but honestly that we do it, is what is important. That you can do it, is what you need to cherish. Life is about the journey, this journey to Ironman is the road less travelled for sure. What you will know when you are done, is that when you put your mind to something and follow it through with hard work and planning, you can do it. If you can do Ironman, what else can you do, it becomes an instant feeling of freedom, we have gotten rid of our limits, we can achieve anything we put our minds to.
Post Race - now is the time to finally mow the lawn, visit the friends you haven't seen in the last year, eat the food you denied yourself and look at the finishers photos. It feels like so long ago already. Time to sign up again.
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